8 little-known habits of highly successful couples, according to relationship therapists

Are you feeling like your relationship could use a boost but aren’t sure where to start?

It’s easy to focus on the big issues, but sometimes the key to a happier, more fulfilling partnership lies in the small, everyday habits that successful couples practice.

These habits might not always be obvious, but they’re crucial for strengthening your bond and creating a deeper connection.

And guess what? Relationship therapists agree. They’ve witnessed firsthand these habits in action among the couples they’ve met.

So, buckle up as I share with you 8 of these little-known habits of highly successful couples. It’s time for some relationship real-talk!

1) Regular check-ins

Now, this might surprise you, but did you know that successful couples have regular ‘check-ins’ with each other?

Yes, you heard that right! Successful couples make it a habit to ‘check in’ with one another throughout the day.

This doesn’t necessarily mean an hour-long conversation. It could be as simple as a quick text message or a brief phone call. It’s about showing interest in each other’s lives.

Experts in relationship therapy have noticed this trend among highly successful couples. They’ve found that these regular check-ins help in maintaining the connection and understanding between the partners.

So start taking a moment to check-in with your significant other either daily or weekly. It could be a game-changer for your relationship!

2) Embracing the quiet moments

Now, let’s talk about the power of silence.

As a self-confessed chatterbox, it took me some time to realize that silence isn’t always a bad thing. In fact, it can be quite beautiful.

Highly successful couples understand and embrace the quiet moments. They don’t feel the need to fill every silence with words. They’re comfortable just being in each other’s presence.

According to Brides Magazine, sharing moments of silence with your significant other is an important part of a healthy relationship.

As writer Lea Rose Emery points out, “Think of the number of hours you’ll be spending together over a lifetime; at some point, silence is inevitable. There’s no need to be afraid of it. Once you’ve accepted it and even come to enjoy it, it will make your relationship that much stronger.”

It’s not about what is said, but how you make each other feel. So, let’s appreciate the silence and make your moments together count.

3) Maintaining individuality

Now, this one’s close to my heart as it’s a major point I’ve emphasized in my book, Breaking The Attachment: How To Overcome Codependency in Your Relationship.

Believe it or not, highly successful couples maintain their individuality. They know that they are two separate people with unique identities, and they respect that.

While sharing interests and experiences is beautiful, it’s crucial to have your own hobbies, passions, and friends. It’s what keeps you interesting as a person and as a partner.

Relationship therapists have observed that couples who balance togetherness and individuality tend to have healthier relationships.

If you’d like to dive deeper into this concept, do check out my book. It offers practical advice on maintaining your individuality while cultivating a healthy relationship.

4) Saying “No”

Now, this might sound counterintuitive, but hear me out.

Highly successful couples aren’t afraid to say “no” to each other. And it’s not about being unkind or selfish. It’s about setting boundaries.

Every person has their own preferences, limits, and comfort zones. And respecting these in a relationship is crucial. It’s the foundation of mutual respect and understanding.

I’ve seen in my practice that couples who can openly express their ‘no’ have a stronger bond. They feel heard and respected, which strengthens their relationship.

So, don’t shy away from saying “no”. It’s not a rejection, but a healthy way to communicate your needs and boundaries.

5) Celebrating small wins

I’m a big fan of celebrating, whether it’s a grand occasion or just the little things in life.

And guess what? Highly successful couples feel the same way.

These couples make it a point to celebrate small victories together. It could be as simple as completing a tough workout or as big as getting a promotion at work.

In my experience, celebrating these moments not only brings joy but also fosters a sense of team spirit. It creates shared memories and helps the couple to feel more connected.

So, don’t wait for the big milestones. Celebrate the small wins together, and watch your bond grow stronger with each shared joy.

6) Accepting imperfections

No one is perfect. We all have our little quirks and flaws. Highly successful couples know this and they accept it.

These couples understand that their partners, like themselves, are beautifully imperfect. They don’t expect perfection, but embrace the imperfections that make their significant other unique.

Relationship therapists have found that this acceptance builds a deep sense of love and understanding in the relationship. It encourages authenticity and reduces the pressure to be someone you’re not.

Let’s seek to embrace imperfections more – in ourselves and in our partners. Because true love isn’t about finding the perfect person, but loving an imperfect person perfectly.

7) Keeping the spark alive

Ah, the spark! That exciting, electrifying feeling we all crave in a relationship.

In my own relationship, I’ve found that keeping the spark alive is a conscious effort. And highly successful couples know this too.

These couples continuously work on reigniting their passion by:

• Making an effort to surprise each other
• Trying new experiences together
• Remembering why they fell in love in the first place

As renowned psychologist, Dr. John Gottman, explains, “Sharing fondness and admiration in intentional ways is the antidote to contempt and it increases the amount of affection in a relationship.”

8) Apologizing sincerely

Now, let’s touch upon something that we all struggle with – apologizing.

Highly successful couples aren’t afraid to say “I’m sorry”. And not just a casual apology, but a sincere, heartfelt one. They understand that mistakes happen and it’s okay to admit them.

These couples acknowledge their wrongdoings and make a genuine effort to make amends. They see apologies not as a sign of weakness, but as a powerful tool for healing and strengthening their bond.

A sincere apology can diffuse tension, resolve conflicts, and restore harmony in the relationship. At the end of the day, love is about growing together, even through our mistakes.

Final thoughts

These habits may seem simple, but they require continuous effort and conscious practice. The good news is, they can make a significant difference in the quality of your relationship.

By incorporating these subtle yet powerful practices into your daily life, you can foster a deeper bond, increase your happiness, and address the areas where your relationship might need a boost.

For more insights and practical advice on maintaining a healthy relationship, do check out my book Breaking The Attachment: How To Overcome Codependency in Your Relationship.

Here’s to building healthier, happier relationships!