7 signs you’re a surprisingly difficult person to get along with, according to psychology

It’s often hard to see ourselves as others do. We may think we’re easy-going, when in reality, we might be a tough nut to crack.

According to psychology, there are telltale signs that indicate whether someone is difficult to get along with. And surprisingly, you might be exhibiting these signs without even realizing it!

In this article, I’ll highlight seven signs that suggest you might be harder to get along with than you think. Don’t worry, it’s not about blame; it’s about awareness and understanding.

So, let’s dive in and discover if you’re unknowingly the difficult one in your relationships.

1) You’re often the center of attention

Psychology suggests that if you constantly find yourself in the middle of drama, it might not be a coincidence.

This doesn’t mean you’re a bad person. It could be that your communication style or behavior unknowingly puts others on edge, leading to misunderstandings or discord.

Being the center of attention isn’t always a good thing, especially if it’s due to constant conflicts. Reflect on your interactions and see if there’s a pattern.

Remember, it’s not about feeling guilty, but understanding how your actions affect those around you and making necessary changes.

2) You find it hard to compromise

This one is a bit personal for me. As a staunch perfectionist, I used to struggle with compromise. I thought my way was the ‘right’ way, and this often led to unnecessary conflicts.

Psychology tells us that being inflexible or unwilling to compromise can make us difficult to get along with. This rigidness can strain relationships and create an environment of tension.

I had to learn the hard way that compromise is a critical aspect of maintaining healthy relationships. It’s about finding a balance and understanding that other people’s ideas and feelings are just as valid as my own.

If you find it hard to bend or meet others halfway, you might be unknowingly making things tough for those around you.

3) You’re consistently negative

Did you know that negativity is contagious? Research shows that being around negative people can actually cause others to adopt the same mindset, leading to a toxic environment.

If you are always looking at the downside, criticizing, or complaining, you could be unknowingly pushing people away. It’s normal to have bad days, but consistent negativity can be a clear sign that you’re difficult to get along with.

It’s worth reflecting on the energy you bring into a room. If it’s mostly gloomy, it might be time for some positive changes.

4) You struggle with empathy

Empathy is the ability to understand and share the feelings of others. It’s vital for building connections and maintaining relationships.

However, if you often find it hard to put yourself in others’ shoes or dismiss their feelings, it might be a sign you’re difficult to get along with. Lack of empathy can come off as uncaring or selfish, which can push people away.

Learning to empathize doesn’t mean you have to agree with everyone. It’s about acknowledging their feelings and perspectives, which can go a long way in improving your relationships.

5) You avoid apologizing

There was a time when I saw apologizing as a sign of weakness. I’d go to great lengths to justify my actions, even when I knew deep down that I was wrong.

Apologies can be hard. They require admitting fault and vulnerability. However, consistently avoiding apologies when they’re needed can make you difficult to get along with. It can come off as prideful or dismissive of others’ feelings.

I’ve learned that a sincere apology doesn’t diminish my worth; instead, it shows maturity and respect for others. If you find it hard to say “I’m sorry,” it might be time to reevaluate why that is.

6) You’re not a good listener

Listening is more than just being silent when someone else is talking. It involves understanding, responding, and showing that you value the speaker’s thoughts and feelings.

If you often find yourself interrupting, zoning out, or preparing your response while others are still speaking, you might be a difficult person to get along with. Good listening skills are fundamental to effective communication and building strong relationships.

So, next time someone is speaking to you, try to really listen. It could make a world of difference in your interactions.

7) You rarely show gratitude

Gratitude is not just about saying “thank you”. It’s about acknowledging the effort or kindness others have shown you.

If you rarely show gratitude, it can make you seem unappreciative or entitled, which can be off-putting. Showing gratitude can significantly improve your relationships and make you a more likable person.

Remember, everyone wants to feel appreciated. A simple expression of gratitude can go a long way.

The takeaway: It’s about awareness and growth

When it comes to human interactions and relationships, psychology offers invaluable insights.

Self-improvement begins with self-awareness. Recognizing these signs doesn’t mean you’re a bad person or that you’re destined to be difficult forever. Instead, it’s an opportunity for growth and change.

Remember, everyone has room for improvement. If you’ve identified with some of these signs, don’t be hard on yourself. Use this understanding as a starting point to become more self-aware and work towards being easier to get along with.

It’s not about perfection, but progression. After all, we’re all works in progress, continually learning and evolving.

So take a moment, reflect on these signs, and ponder what steps you can take to enhance your interactions and relationships. Because at the end of the day, it’s the quality of our relationships that truly enrich our lives.

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Tina Fey

I've ridden the rails, gone off track and lost my train of thought. I'm writing to try and find it again. Hope you enjoy the journey with me.

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