(UR) Fresh off of his victory in declaring his administration’s response to Hurricane Maria in Puerto Rico — which killed 3,000 Americans — an “unsung success,” Trump says FEMA is prepared to stymie Hurricane Florence’s onslaught of the Carolinas by deploying massive amounts of paper towels.
The agency will be equipped with “BILLIONS of paper towels needed to stop Hurricane Florence storm surge,” the president announced on Twitter shortly after calling Puerto Rico’s death toll fake news fabricated by democrat scientists.
The president plans a repeat of his epic hand-delivery of paper towels to Puerto Rico which “saved millions of lives and single-handedly defeated Hurricane Maria by absorbing trillions of gallons of rainwater,” Fox News added.
Christian conservatives on Facebook have correctly compared Trump’s paper towel delivery to the act of Jesus walking on water.
Trump is ready to take on hurricane season
Satire / Underground Reporter